pil·lage [pil-ij]

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Inside Casa la Feve, we speak our own language.  The pussy (the furry female four-footed one) is The Button, my spouse is The Smotch, and in general, we are very fond of the suffix, -age.

Boobage, for example.  And snackage.  (Sometimes the two are one in the same.  😉 )

So we do not have pillows on the bed in our master (Mistress?) bedroom.  Instead, we have pillage.

Pillage.

Which is especially appropriate, I think, because I tend to steal pillage from my Smotch.

Most recently, at 2:13am.

Hmmm…  I need more pillage, I thought to myself.  So I’ll just steal the one under Smotchy’s head.

3…

2…

1…

Thunk.

His head hit the mattress, earning me a discombobulated half-awake stare.

Earning *him* a grin.  😀

{Insert utter bafflement and rapid blinking (his, of course) here.}

“And why,” he drawled confusedly, “did you snatch my pillage?”

“Retaliation,” I explained with academic assuredness.  “Retaliation for the converse.”

(It drives him batty when I use mathematicalegalese, especially at this hour…  Which is why I do it.  😀 )

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he stared owlishly at me, attempting to formulate a question.  “Uhhh…?”

“Or is it the inverse?  Retaliation for the inverse.  Or the converse.  I forget.”

Blink, blink.

“You see,” I said (in my most smug school-marm voice), “I have snatched your pillage…”

“Errr…?”

“…Because YOU are forever pillaging my snatch.”

0 thoughts on “pil·lage [pil-ij]

      1. jayne

        loved the “trying to make sense and owl eyed” description of waking him with your totally justified, thieving way. It IS only fair. Turnaround is fair play….and all ; )

        Reply
  1. Bill

    And I thought you would be sharing the poetry of desperate prisoners, instead you just wanted an in-mate.

    Reply
  2. kanienke

    You are always so clever with your tongue and it makes me laugh… and then shiver. I love stories of your everyday playfulness with your Smotch. Love and laughter… does it get any better?

    Reply
  3. My Mental Stream

    That is bloody brilliant! No way in hell I would be able to think of something that clever at that time in the morning. I certainly know how I would have reacted if I had been him in that situation. Great little post

    Reply

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