There is much to be said for hospitals. Like, “What’s that terrible smell?” -and- “You’re gonna put what in my WHAT?!?”
And there is even more to be said for hospital waiting rooms. Like, “Excuse me ma’am, but why is your screaming child not wearing a muzzle? And has he had his rabies shots?”
I am a great admirer of medical professionals, don’t get me wrong. I just prefer to admire them from afar. From very far afar.
However, my husband likes to get up close and personal with the White Coats and the Scrubs on a fairly regular basis. (Just between you and me, I think the whole female-nurse-snapping-on-gloves thing just does it for him. I married a man with a medical fetish. Figures.) So today’s blog entry – which is being typed at a speed of 12 words per minute on my hideous new phone, because touchscreens SUCK, and not in that awesome “Oh God baby YES don’t stop don’t stop!” kind of way – is brought to you by the letter F, for FUCK do I hate hospitals(!), and by the number 57. Because that’s how many mistakes I’ve made so far in this… well, whatever this is. This literary masterpiece.
Oh, and I am blogging from a hospital, in case that wasn’t obvious.
Because in addition to his mad crush on Nurse Ratchet, my husband has decided to give breath play a go and is having a tube shoved down his throat this afternoon. Which means he needs a designated driver when he’s finished.
Madame la Feve: Designated Driver Extraordinaire
Just don’t ask me how we get home from here. Because I have NO. IDEA.
I also have no idea why my screen will highlight words at random and then not allow me to bold them. Hmmm… The tecknologees. They doth suck.
You know, I had a point when I started writing. I just have zero recollection at this point of what that might have been.
When I remember, I’ll be back.
Meanwhile, I am in the process of a major move. So I may be scarce for awhile. But I will be checking in as regularly as possible and should be back to posting on a normal basis (for whatever that’s worth) by Christmas. Til then, may your season be merry and bright.
And to all, a good night! ????