Readers sometimes ask me questions about my husband. About his personality, his interests, how he got his nickname, how we got together, etc. I feel like I write about him a lot, in that our interactions – sexual and non – make for regular blog fodder. But I recognize that there is a difference between writing about him and writing *about* him. And outside of our silly scenarios… Honestly… I’m not quite sure what to say. Not that I can’t describe him, or that I’m incapable of telling our story, but it’s… A balancing act. We have real lives, and real identities, and when it comes to what I write here, I always have to consider, What can I say that won’t give too much away?
Hmmm… What can I say?
I can say quite a bit, as it turns out.
If you are interested, read on.
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JOURNEY
Highway run into the Midnight Sun
Steve Perry’s voice rings clear with the complication of simplistic honesty, and every time I listen to the four-note intro ~ D# – C# – E – D# ~ the melody transposes in my mind to the key of Ain’t – That – The – Truth . . .
Wheels go round and round in my mind
* * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * *
Loving a Music Man ain’t always what it’s Supposed To Be
(Ain’t that the truth.)
My hubby is a Music Man.
Long before he and I stumbled upon one another, my husband stumbled into Steve Perry and company one fateful night in a bar in Buffalo, and struck up a conversation. During which, he inadvertently managed to cock block the band boy{s} (they were all so young then) when a would-be groupie approached the musicians at the bar.
She had sashaying hips, a cigarette dangling from her lips, and was angling for a light.
And how, you are wondering, did Smotchy manage to cock block a rock star?
Heh. By flicking open his zippo and holding it out for the “lady” in question, all the while chatting up Steve Perry as though the lead singer was just a Regular Guy. He was completely oblivious to the dumbfounded daggers L’il Miss Thang was throwing at him from her eyes, let alone to the reaction of the band.
There was approximately a three-second delay between lighting her up (heh) and the inevitable . . .
. . . oh . . . (not to be confused with The Inevitable O)
Woops.
I wasn’t there when it happened. I was, in fact, in elementary school at the time, so odds are I was watching The Muppet Show that fateful evening. (Yes, there is a significant age difference between us.) However, I can picture this scenario with crystal clarity. (And snort-laugh about it.) Because that is my Smotch.
He’s like that, you see. He just… does things… sometimes – often with the blind innocence of good intentions – that leave the people around him going, “Whaaa…?”
o_O
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We all need the clowns to make us SMILE
He makes me smile.
He is a funny one. (And a punny one, which you already know if you’re a regular reader.) He can be reserved at times, but when he’s feeling comfortable in his own skin, he is the Life Of The Party. And when I want to have a ‘party’… Well, then he is the Life Of The Party. 😀
For example:
I’ve played with other foodstuffs (chocolate syrup, strawberries, whipped cream) in the past, with previous lovers, but covering my honey with honey is the tasty fun that I remember best. Perhaps because it was the most recent? Maybe….. Though I’m sure there’s more to it than that. Because it was simply something I wanted to do, and instead of analyzing it or questioning it or only wanting to do it because he’d seen it in porn (my ex was notorious for that last one), my husband just quietly accepted it for what it was (FUN!), and joyfully came along for the ride. (Puns intended.)
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I shared that story with a good friend (verbatim – that was taken from an email exchange) a while back, who responded . . .
“. . . love his reactions to you. They always seem to have this cautious “oh dear what am I getting into now?” sort of feel to them. I admit I have this potent mental image of you going about your day, being suddenly struck with a desire, and stalking and pouncing on your prey with gleeful abandon.”
↔
And my husband does get pounced on by me. Gleefully.
But also . . .
Metaphorically speaking… My ‘pouncing’ can be more Offensive Tackle than Playful Push. Over the course of our relationship I have presented him with various ideas, expectations, desires, and demands that have knocked him for a loop.
I am not easy on him. Because I love him too much to be easy. I consistently confront him with hard truths. Occasionally those truths are things that he’d prefer to run from. And frankly, many others would run. And have run. And are still running, even as I type this.
But not him.
He hasn’t run.
Not Yet.
And ever the pragmatic optimist, I hold out hope for Not Ever.
* * * * * * * * * *
I get the Joy of Rediscovering You
I am constantly learning ~ and re-learning ~ him.
He has been the constant in my life for 11 years, and in that time I have seen him struggle, triumph, grow, and change. He is an incredible friend, a compassionate lover, a creative soul, a die-hard dreamer, a beautiful mess.
Oh girl, you stand by me
He makes me laugh… And he drives me batshit insane.
He is who he is and I don’t ever want him to be anyone else.
Sometimes I want to wring his neck.
Other times I want to wring every last drop of cum from his cock. 😉
* * * * * * * * * *
I know at times he worries about keeping up, about being enough. But I need only for him to be Who He Is. So that we can be Who We Are.
And we are imperfect. We struggle, with ourselves and with one another. We face our challenges just like everyone else. But through it all, even with the curveballs our life together has thrown at him, he hits it out of the park when he says . . .
I’m forever Yours
FAITHFULLY
Sigh….:)
🙂
Ah, Feve. This is beautiful. Relationships have such nuances; they’re made up of so many tiny, personal, strange, lovely moments. You managed to say so much about yours without saying too much at all. Excellently crafted.
Also, that is definitely my second favorite Journey song. Gonna be stuck in my head as I go about my day. I don’t mind at all.
Xoxo
Thank you.
Relationships are indeed nuanced. No two are ever the same. It is subtle, the way two people refine the inner workings of a relationship over time. We are not the same individuals we were when we started out on our journey together; our dynamic is not the same today as it was in the beginning, and we will continue – individually and together – to morph over time.
Faithfully. It’s not a bad song to have on mental replay as you go about your day, eh? 😉 There is one other Journey song that I like just as much as this one. But that is a different post for a different day. 🙂
Sounds like a great guy, you two are lucky together!
He’s a good man.
I love that song!
But OMG! Look at all those “sharps” on the sheet music! (Yes, all five of them.) It’s actually a VERY difficult song to play.
Still love it though. 😀
Key of B major, I think.
Do you play, Fur?
Once upon a time I played the piano/keyboard. I bought the sheet music to their “Greatest Hits” album. (It cost more than the album!) I couldn’t play that song, but other’s were easier, like “Open Arms”. 🙂
I remember asking my mom to play it for me. (I would often ask her to play something before I tried to learn it. She was a professional musician and could read music as she played it. On the other hand I played by ear and memorization.) It stumped her for a little bit!
I still have a small keyboard, but I don’t play it much. I’m starting to forget all the songs I once knew. (A lot of Journey, Whitesnake, REO Speedwagon, etc.. Stuff to make the girls swoon. lol)
I haven’t tried to play it, but I can easily see how the syncopated rhythm combined with the sixteenth notes in the intro would be challenging. I’m a decent sight reader, but I’m classically trained. I envy your ability to play by ear.
Heeeey – where’s that coolest picture ever of your lacy panties? I mean nice little bud you have now…I always thought that angle of a pic was unique.
Anyway – (shiny thought distraction there) Your story is what “Happily Ever After” looks like in my head.I have no delusions of the reality but you seem to have the embers to raise the flames as needed. Congrats to you and Smotch. Jayne
I tried changing my WP theme recently and it didn’t work out so well, so when I rebuilt this one I just kept the cropped photos I had played around with for that header and background. See, on the design that didn’t work out, the blog title was inside the flower. And as a result, with the shading, the flower looked like a very different kind of ‘flower’, if you know what I mean. 😉
The lacy panties are to the right, on the side bar. I need to have Smotch find the digital camera and take some more pictures.
I don’t know about ‘happily ever after’ but for all our differences, we get along pretty well together. Not that everything is always sunshine and roses. There have definitely been times in our relationship where one or the other of us has thought, “What the hell…?!?!” But we’ve made it work so far, and hopefully will continue to be able to do so in the future. 🙂
Yes – caught the bud look immediately – maybe your lace panties over the rose’s bud…
To me there is no “Happily Ever After” but people can come damn close to reaching it like a high bounce or a vacation destination. You can get there with the right type of person and love but you can’t stay there. That is what it sounds like you have. xo
Errr… That would require some amount of photo-techno ability, of which a possess none. So I’ll just stick with Plan A, which is to have Smotchy take some new pictures. o_O
And as for vacation… I need one.
Me too. A room with a wall is looking good right now – that and room service is all I need. jk
I have my own definition of “room service” and yes, it’s definitely needed. 😉
Damn…I like your idea better than food.
And now there is a different header of those same panties. Just for you. 😛
It was unique and an artistically perfect tease – that’s why I liked it so much thank you ! xo, J I can relax now.
I’ve been in the role of the one pushing and the one being pushed. An observation that AB made was that the opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference. Although she never said the following I had a tendency to think it, “now take care of this for your own good.” I’m really not good at conflict resolution. I can agree to disagree without the other person agreeing to. I also tend to think, “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak up and remove all doubt.” Politics and religion are a couple of minefields for most people, but in relationships money is right up there.
Prattling on is one of my faults.
Operating on the assumption that love requires investment, I can see how love’s opposite would be indifference. Investment and Indifference are both multi-facted concepts though, and can work hand-in-hand. Being invested in one’s physique, for example, can go hand-in-hand with being indifferent to one’s diet. I’ve known gym rats who eat like greasy spoon fry cooks. Equal and opposite.
And silence is often interpreted as agreement. That is what’s foolish.
Money can be a sticky issue, and not just because cash carries more germs than a room full of snot-nosed toddlers either. For the most part though, we communicate pretty well in that regard. But there have been times – particularly when it comes to how “our” money is used individually – when we’ve clashed pretty significantly. His sense of what is financially ‘fair’ and ‘equal’ doesn’t always jive with mine.
Dude/ This post totally rocks my socks. Thank you for sharing all of this.
Heh. Picturing dancing socks…
You’re welcome. Glad you liked it. 🙂
*insert clappy hands/huge smilie x’s 100 here*
Lady Feve said:
He is who he is and I don’t ever want him to be anyone else.
That has me sentimentally teary eyed smiling as I sip my first cup of coffee this morning. It’s gonna be a “warm fuzzy” that will stay with me for a while.
Warm fuzzies are a Good Thing. 🙂
Careful with the tears though, Serendipity. Salt doesn’t taste very good in coffee. 😉
Interesting reading about your husband’s perfect imperfections, Ms. Fever. All relationships have ’em. That’s what keeps things alive and fresh 🙂
I for one like your new wall paper …. ( Hey, OK, you looked really good in the lace panties 🙂 ) … BUT, when I invited my GF to join the conversation over here, She took one look at your photo and thought it was a porno site; without even reading anything and told me to stay away from it 🙁
Oh well, she is gone and I am back 🙂
As Charlie Brown would say… “Good grief.” Such insecurity, completely unfounded. I know break-ups can be hard, and I’m sorry you’ve gone through one. But I’m glad you’re back. 🙂
We’re all imperfect, eh. That’s what makes people so beautiful.
Good grief is right, Ms. Fever… Hey, I’ve heard it said one time … Imperfect = I’m perfect! 🙂
It’s a pity that the like button isn’t on individual comments too. I’d like this one. I guess there is at least one good thing about Facebook.
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