Sounding Off About Kink

Kinks are funny things.  For some people, they are hard-line must-haves and their kinks are the always the same, no matter who their partner happens to be.  There are people who are ‘into spanking’ or ‘into bondage’ or ‘into watching lizards mate’ or whatever, and that’s just Who They Are.  They know what they like, and they like *that specific activity* no matter what.

Me?  Not so much.

For me, kinks – much like fantasies – are not so much about the Practice as they are about the Person.

If you were to ask me what I’m into, activity-wise, I’d be hard pressed to answer.

Am I into spanking?  Sure.  Kinda.  Mostly.  Maybe?  Giving moreso than receiving, but only with the right person, and only under specific conditions.  It is not a one-size-fits-all activity for me.

Am I into bondage?  Not really.  Actually, being on the receiving end of rope ties has pretty much always been a hard limit for me.  However, I have sort of a broad interest in Shibari.  I find the aesthetics pleasing and the design configurations appeal to the artist in me.  I think I may have found the right person with whom to explore my generalized interest and with/for whom I can make it a more personalized fit.

Am I into watersports?  Well, I have a general interest.  And I’ve gotten to participate in some specific ‘sporting’ events, with very specific people, which was pretty awesome.  It’s not for everyone though, and is certainly not a must-have with my sexual partners.

Nursing?  Well, there was one person who made that incredibly hot for me.  Will I go there again?  I kinda doubt it, but maybe I would if I had the right partner for it.

That’s how most kinky things are for me.  I have a broad, general interest in something.  A curiosity.  A “hmnh” response.  And so I think about it a bit.  Or I don’t.  And then one day I meet a person with whom I am compatible when it comes to that particular kink, a person who has similar thoughts and curiosities about it, and suddenly it’s a whole new – very personalized – ball game.

One of the kinky things I have a generalized interest in is Sounding.

Basically, Sounding is “. . . simple on its face; you’re inserting a rod in the urethra and feeding it forward for some distance.  The sensations this drives, along with other aspects, can be… intense.  The sounds, those metal rods that you use as the toys in this kink are specially made, are sterilizable and come in different sizes.  As you can see in the picture, you can go from very small to very large.  It does work for those with, and without a penis, though it may be more prevalent in those with a penis.”  (Thank you, Steeled Snake, for the description and the photo.)

Image courtesy of Steeled Snake

For those of you who are crossing your legs and mentally crying at that visual, now would be a good time to click away and go read something else.

It’s okay.  I’ll wait.

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All better?  Okay, moving on.

For those of you who are still reading, here’s the deal:

I don’t have any great interest in pain.  I don’t particularly enjoy inflicting it (but I will if it’s what you’re into), and I will absolutely not allow you to inflict pain on me.  So to be clear:  My interest in urethral sounding doesn’t have anything to do with pain.

It’s more about…

Sensation.

[Also, at heart I’m kind of a little kid at times, with the whole “I know that’s not supposed to go there, but I wanna see what happens when I try it” mentality.  (I once shoved a candy wrapper up my nostril as a child just to see what would happen.  I was petrified I wouldn’t get it out before my mom came back from running her errand.  {My brother and I were waiting in the car while she was in the bank.  It was acceptable to leave your kids like that in the ’70s.}  I only *just* managed it, and the adventure was secret-whisper relived-adventure conversation fodder between me and my little brother for at least a week afterward.)  So why not try it?]

I have things inserted inside myself fairly often, all of which provide varying sensations.  Glass things, silicone things, vibrating things, girthy things, thrusty things, fleshy things, lubricated things, etc.  I’m not all that huge a fan of penetration (which is probably a post for another time), so often, for me, the sensations brought about by penetrative activity are not great, but they are still good.  Even if the ‘fit’ of my various toys is stretchy or snug or oddly textured or cold or insert-descriptive-word-here, the sensation(s) are still enjoyable (even if they aren’t exactly comfortable).

And that’s kind of how I feel about Sounding.

Granted, when I think about Sounding, it’s in terms of me performing the action on a willing male.  It’s not about me being on the receiving end.  (But I’m pretty open-minded.  I have very few hard limits, and this is not one of them.  So never say never.)

This is how my brain works when I look at the photo of sounding rods above:

• Hmmm, those metal rods look smooth.  I bet they’re a bit on the chilly side too.
• I like the sensation of smooth chilly things inside me.  I especially like warming them up.
• I want to put smooth chilly things inside HIM.  Oooh–!  That would be fun.
• I like that they’re graduated.  It’s like…  Levels.  OMG, he could graduate to the next level!
• I bet if I stroked him with that rod inside him he’d feel like he’s being fucked from the inside out.
• OhOhOh!  Vibrators!  I could run a vibrator along his shaft with the Sound inside him.
• Hmmm…  *Feve wanders off to find her favorite vibrator*
• SQUIRL!

That’s an example of my general mental meanderings.

Partner-specific (I’ll use hubs for an example) thoughts are more along the lines of:

When I flick my tongue over his slit and sort of spank his urethral opening during blow jobs, he arches off the bed like an acrobatic monkey on crack.  So I know he likes the stimulation.  And when I curl my tongue and fuck down deeper, pressing into his hole, he sort of sighs contentedly.  I wonder how he’d like it if I slid something else down in there…

To be clear:  Even though I’ve had those thoughts about trying urethral sounding with my husband, I have not requested it of him.  And there are reasons for that.  I’ve seen him catheterized (which was fascinating – I’ve never had any interest in being a nurse until I saw one do that), and even though he has a high pain tolerance, I know that experience tweaked him a bit.  Since I don’t want anything sexual to remind him of anything medical – or vice versa – I won’t be asking him to play Sounding games with me.  (But if he asks me, I’m all in!)

Going back to my original point:  I don’t think hubs is the right person with whom to practice that particular kink.  Because for me, it’s about the person, not the practice.

Perhaps one day the right person will come along.

In the mean time, Sounding remains on the list of Things That Interest Me.

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What about you?
Are you a Person or a Practice kinkster?
What are your thoughts on urethral sounding?

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