Discipline
When people hear the word ‘discipline’, the go-to interpretation of the word seems to often be ‘punishment’.
However, the kind of discipline that appeals to me is self-discipline.
As in: if I am disciplined about enacting my intentions, I will reach my goal.
Personal History
I don’t talk a lot about my family of origin on this blog — and there are good reasons for that; to say they got a lot of things wrong (and continue to get things wrong) is an understatement — but one of the things I learned growing up in the environment I did, was: if you want something, you have to work for it.
I applied this rule to great effect in my early teens. Entering high school, I knew that the only way I was going to get anywhere in life was if I first got an education. And if I was going to be able to go to college, I was going to have to work my tail off to {a} get accepted, and {b} get scholarships to pay for it.
And so, at the age of 14, I created a 4-year plan for Getting The Hell Out. Starting with: take the toughest classes possible and pass them with the highest grade you possibly can.
I stuck to that plan.
It worked.
When I got into college, I created another plan — one I was disciplined about — and when I graduated (with honors, thankyouverymuch), I was on to the next.
It’s Not Luck, It’s Work
Creating a plan and sticking to it — being disciplined, not getting distracted from the goal{s}, continuing onward despite hardships — is something that has worked for me throughout my life.
Emphasis on worked.
Because it *is* work. Hard work, at times. And even things that are ‘simple’ in concept are often NOT EASY. (Ever tried to lose weight? “Stop consuming so many calories” is a simple intellectual concept; successfully applying that concept to one’s habits can be damned difficult.)
One of the things that drives me bonkers is when people respond to seeing the results of my hard work with, “Wow, you’re lucky.”
Because I’m not lucky.
I’m just focused.
I make a plan and I work toward it.
But being able to do that requires discipline.
And *that* kind of discipline can only come from within.
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Are you a disciplined person?
What have you made a plan for and worked to achieve?
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My theme for this year’s A-to-Z Blogging Challenge is Twenty(-six) Questions.
The question I have posed (and answered) above is related to self-discipline.
For more of this year’s ‘questionable’ alphabetical posts, please see here.
Now I’m retired my aim is to keep as physically fit as possible (within limits). This requires getting up at 6.30am each weekday and walking to aqua fit or gym classes. I suppose that is a discipline I impose on myself in order to feel better. I know what you mean about discipline needed for weight loss. It is very hard to lose two or three kilos even if one is only slightly overweight. That is why support groups such as WW are helpful.
Discipline is needed to finish A to Z as well! Here’s hoping we both get there.
Oh, good for you! I find exercise to be a difficult thing to be disciplined about. I applaud your dedication!
I can be disciplined when I need to be, and at other times completely not. It all depends on my motivation. I have to stick to the plan with my YouTube channel or I would never get the eps out😊. Good on you for following your plans.
Tasha
Tasha’s Thinkings: YouTube – What They Don’t Tell You (and free fiction)
Oh Yes — motivation is key! I am completely undisciplined about doing laundry. *laugh*
As a bit of an obsessive, I naturally have reached personal and career goals through work and discipline…….and when that happens I consider myself lucky. Why lucky? Because I have also had hard work and discipline result in some other less qualified person being promoted over me due to connections. I have seen, not just in my own case, but everywhere, how too often “hard work” doesn’t mean striving to be the best at something, but rather doggedly pushing past others to the top. Certainly both take effort, but the latter is not something that results in the best being rewarded but the most relentless. I have also been ‘targeted’ for trying to do what is ethical and right in difficult situations…….something that takes a lot of work and self-discipline, because higher-ups wanted me to do sleazy things instead.
So when hard work in terms of competence, and self-discipline in terms of integrity, are rewarded I see that as “lucky” because it is certainly not the way things always go, and in my experience actually result in good outcomes in a minority of situations.
This is not just opinion either. Studies have consistently reported the correlation between upper tier success and having had a head start through wealthy and powerful parents. Similar statistics have also shown how the upper tier is practically immune from failure. Sure, people do break into the top tier through work, but they are as lucky as a lottery winner despite their also being competent. And even in these cases……think Bill Gates and his ilk………smart? yes. Hard working? definitely. But also willing to crush others along the way? Oh yeah.
I don’t work in a field where an “upper tier” exists (except through longevity and skill) and have been self employed for most of my life, so the clamoring rat race you describe is – “luckily” – not something I have dealt with.
I don’t equate money/wealth with success, but where getting rich is concerned, I absolutely agree with your assertion re: being born to it and/or being ruthless to gain it. Having come out of difficult circumstances myself, though, and having ‘moved up’ (decent house, safe neighborhood, the bills get paid), I can say that for me, personally, the circumstances of my birth were overcome through hard work.
I think you know that when I want to be i can discipline the heck out of myself. Exhibit 1 – my eating habits (not the chips, the low carb and red and processed meat part of it) Exhibit 2 – doing the exercise thing – both regular stuff and now, the physio stuff.
But it really has to do with how much I want it. And I also have no tolerance for people who say they WANT something but make up a million excuses why they CANT do it. Especially if the thing they want is attainable. I mean, i want to be 25 again, but that’s not gonna happen 😀
I want the *body* I had at 25, but I wouldn’t want to actually BE 25 again! So long, creaky bones!
*laugh*
Yes, it definitely has to do with how bad you want it. I want to wear my purple sweater today, but it needs to be washed and I can’t be arsed to do laundry. So NOPE, not gonna happen! *laugh*
I have a very bad habit of bouncing between being extremely disciplined and having pretty much zero self discipline. I’ll be pretty much perfect at something for a while and then let it go completely. I’m trying to work on that, but it’s a very slow process since all or nothing seems to be my default.
I get that. I definitely do better with timelines and incremental results, because it helps me stay disciplined. I think that’s why I have such a hard time staying on top of basic household chores — they don’t improve, and they never end! — but thankfully, my spouse enjoys those kinds of tasks. So I let him be the disciplined one in those areas. 🙂
For the most part, I can definitely focus and work towards what I want, however, I think like most of us, there is an area or two that prove much more challenging. For me it’s exercise. But the real question your post has me pondering is how did discipline become equated with punishment? Focusing and carry through are one thing, making someone “pay” is something else entirely. At least in my mind.
I wonder if it’s a generational thing? When I was growing up, “discipline your children” basically meant “punish them when they do wrong.” But of course, physical punishment (spankings, washing your mouth out with soap, etc) has largely gone out of style since then. So maybe it’s only a correlation for folks over 40? I’m not sure.
I’m the same, I have always had to work hard for stuff, so I’m always on the next plan. I’m also “lucky” to deal with stress and anxiety by escaping into doing things, so I can be pretty driven and hard-working through bad times.
I tend to delve into work/projects/life-changes when I’m stressed, so I totally relate!
This is something I struggle with unless it is a creative thing. I have, over the years, developed systems to try and help me but and I know everything I have created I have done by applying myself but sometimes my brain struggles with keeping on task.
Molly
I can see how creative endeavors would be more motivating. My tendency with creative things is to start/stop/wait/start/wait… Etc. *laugh* It drives my husband nuts if that “creative” thing is one that requires physical materials of any kind, because I leave them out for.EVER. 😉
As an author it’s so important to be disciplined! Enjoyed this, thank you!
Sticking to a routine must be challenging at times!
Hi, Feve! I’m catching up here…….
I’m glad you accomplished Plan Get The Hell Out!!! Good job! You made it waaaaaay out!
I was a disciplined athlete …… I was disciplined in my faith (needed to lighten my burden a bit over the years though)……and disciplined to finish my math degree even though it took me a long time due to illness and then mamahood……. I’d be more focused if I didn’t struggle so much with health stuff. Sometimes it’s just one thing at a time. I’m not a list maker type of person though because I don’t think I’d get enough of it done on time. LOL Not my kind of ttwd. Storm’s discipline though…..yum yum ! ha!
Haha! Yes, there are certain kinds of “discipline” that can be rather delicious! 😉
I’m totally familiar with “life gets in the way” — which, as you say, can slow things down quite a bit — and I know it takes a lot of dedication to work through/past those things to go after what you want. My husband has had his share of health struggles and I know it’s not an easy obstacle to overcome. Good for you for finishing your math degree!
The “lucky” comment made me laugh and grimace. We’ve also had that thrown at us when we’ve put in the work.
My self-discipline this year has been yoga. I’ve managed to do it every day except for 3 that life just wouldn’t allow it to happen. Exercise has always been my worst thing for self-discipline.
I’m terrible about exercise, so I admire your commitment. For me, if I can play a sport or take a trail hike or do physical work (gardening, anyone?), THAT I like. But “exercising” — nope, I totally struggle to stick to routines.
I am an extremely disciplined person, sometimes too disciplined for my own good…
~ Marie xox
Yes, I think there is a risk that “getting it done” (whatever ‘it’ is) can become consuming.
There is nothing surprising in your story, rather it is a confirmation of the rule. True, this rule does not work for everyone, but for strong personalities who are able to make plans and achieve goals. And the difficult conditions of existence, especially in childhood and adolescence, are a strong additional (sometimes the main) motivator.
Motivation is certainly important. Without the (inner) drive to do better, all we attain is mediocrity.
I whole-heartedly agree…self-discipline is the secret sauce to just about any great accomplishment. Great post!
⮞ AnjelaCurtis.com via AtoZ Road Trip… 🚗
I like that — “secret sauce.”
Thanks for visiting!
It’s difficult to distinguish between habit or routine, and discipline. If I do not make my kombucha each week, give or take a day, then it will go too sour’ if I don’t water all the houseplants once a week, then they will die. On the other hand, finishing a novel last year, helped by making it the subject of A2Z 2021, was not something that I could do every day which would work well for me, however, life intervenes, the needs of my partner’s health, and work (going back up to 4 days a week because we were moving factory).
So there are compromises, and that which is not indispensable (watering plants and making kombucha on time), gets time as and when. If I was completely free to do what I liked, when I liked, I don’t think it would take discipline to write every day.
This year, writing about food has helped me become more disciplined about Low Carb diet and that has borne results with blood sugars descending to where they need to be – now I just need to get more exercise…
I think a certain amount of discipline is required to establish and maintain routines, though perhaps more (or a different kind?) discipline is required for things that don’t fit into that routine. And we must always make room for “life gets in the way.” Flexibility is important, even within the framework of stick-to-it-ness. 🙂
Congratulations on lowering your blood sugar! Dietary ‘stuff’ can be quite a minefield — I am always impressed when people can navigate through all the potential explosions toward positive results!
I am very disciplined with things I want to do. And with things I’m in control of. Such as my genealogy research. I am good with what i eat unless someone else offers me something I would never get myself, or cooks me something I wouldn’t cook. I will eat it then.
In school I worked hard on the subjects I was interested in and enough in the others.
https://findingeliza.com/
Yes, it’s definitely easier to be disciplined about things we *want* — I find it much more difficult to be disciplined about “supposed-to” tasks. I’m not so good with “should”s. 😉
Stopping by from the #AtoZChallenge Road Trip!
I agree with you that self-discipline is important, not only in achieving your goals, but to be a better person also. Having self-discipline can show others that you are responsible and reliable. It helps you build trust with others. But you must remember that self-discipline in your actions, cannot stand alone. You need to be have empathy and compassion so that you know when it is necessary to restructure your expectations and goals to fit others needs. That, too, impacts respect and trust by others.
The other thing that needs to be built in to your self-discipline in achieving goals is time to rest and reflect. Both allow you to stay healthy, depending on your goal, and fine tune your plans.
This was great reading. I look forward to reading some of your other posts.
Reflections and reassessments are important, I agree.
For starters, you need to be a smart person from birth in order to be able to set goals correctly and achieve them. And luck will be a bonus to daily work.
I don’t know how much intelligence it takes, though a certain amount of self awareness and logic must be applied — because I don’t think you have to be bright to be focused. I know people who have a lot of smarts who are total train wrecks when it comes to maintaining financial independence, for example, and I also know people who dropped out of high school but are financially successful.
Visiting from the A to Z Road Trip. Congratulations on having your hard work pay off! Self-discipline is certainly a valuable skill.
Anne E.G. Nydam recently posted…Words of the Month – Linen for Summer
Thanks. It’s not always easy but it’s always worth it!