Sent Emails (in which we discuss my vagina)

People are sometimes taken aback by the way I discuss sex.  Like it’s normal.  Like it’s just a part of life.  Like it’s funny.  And functional.  And sometimes personal.

Getting personal – in terms of Sex As Conversation – is no big deal to me.  I think it surprises people when they email me and I just talk about things matter-of-factly.  Sex is not All Eroticism, All The Time!  It’s just a part of being human.  And it’s something I talk about – openly and unabashedly – with the people I consider friends.

So I was looking through past emails this evening, searching for one in particular, because it covered a topic that’s been on my mind to write about.  I didn’t find it.

*foot stomp*

But I did find something else, and decided to post it here.  Mostly because people get all tense about talking about their bodies, and no matter how much The Experts tell us to Communicate, Communicate, Communicate!, I feel like nobody ever really models how to do that.  But also because I really miss the flow of communication with this particular friend, and re-reading this snippet (which is actually a very small part of a rather large conversation) reminded me of our connection(s).  And made me laugh.  I needed that.  🙂

So here you are, from the Fever files, circa 2012:

.

In response to this:  It seems like an eternity since I last saw pubic hair and I don’t know why, but it is very deeply alluring for me.

Good to know!  I have pubic hair.  There are times when I shave completely, but it’s rare.  Mostly I keep my lips and bikini line smoothly shaven, so my slit and clit are openly visible and easily accessible.  My labia majora is kind of pink and pouty, and you have to spread my chubby little outer lips to see my labia minora, which is usually a slick, glossy pink.  Unless I’m fully aroused, at which time, the minora peeks out the tiniest bit when my lips are closed and flushes a deep red.  I don’t have much of a hood over my clit, but that little button swells and hardens and will continue to swell more and harden further the more attention it gets.  So I keep that whole area bare, which serves a dual purpose:  it’s sanitary, and it’s sexy.  Above my clit and across my mound, I maintain a tight bush of kinky brown pubic hair.  It doesn’t curl tightly, but rather, it’s much like the hair on my head in that it’s more wavy than curly and it’s soft to the touch.

So I think you would like the outside of my vagina.

I think you’d like the inside of my vagina too.  ;) winking

Hmmm…  My vagina.

Yes, let’s talk about my vagina.  Or rather, let’s talk about terms for my vagina.

Pussy:  I love this term.  She pants, she purrs, she loves to be stroked, she arches for attention.  It is absolutely, 100% okay for you (‘you’ in the general sense of ‘you’ – not You, specifically) to refer to my vagina as my “pussy”.  Green light! 

Kitty:  Slightly more kitschy, but the same general concepts apply.  This one has the capability of weirding me out slightly though, because my kitties are my pets, so…  Yellow light. 

Cunt:  This one is mine and mine alone.  Sometimes when I’m writing, I’ll refer to my vagina as my cunt.  It’s an effective way for me to paint a picture of raw sex.  ‘Cunt’ is such a guttural, primal word that the images it conjures (for me, anyway) are of sweaty, frantic, clawing sexual need.  Cunt.  I will read the word.  I will write the word.  I will veeery rarely speak the word, and when I do it’s to tease…in a Domme sort of way.  As in:  It’s time for your tongue to pleasure my cunt.  But generally, I do not like it when another person refers to my vagina in this manner.  Generally.  There are, of course, exceptions to this rule.  Amber.

Hole:  Smotch is the only one who has ever tried this one, and he’s probably the only person I’ll ever let get away with it.  So for anyone else but him?  Red light.

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Admittedly, some things have changed since this email was originally composed.  (I’ll leave you to wonder exactly what those things might be.  Heh.)  And the person I was writing to was – and still is, really – someone to whom I could say anything, absolutely anything (still can), and the conversation would just…  Flow.

{It’s very cool to have people love you that way.}

SO.

Consider that your own up-close-and-personal “snapshot” of my vagina.

Heh.

Any questions?
Seriously, you can ask whatever you want.
(Just…  Y’know…  Don’t be a douche.)

31 thoughts on “Sent Emails (in which we discuss my vagina)

  1. Tom Cooper

    Okay, here’s a question. As someone soon to reenter rhe dating world after decades away, are women as fond of men who ‘groom’ their nether region as men are of a well shaved pussy?

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      That’s a really good question, and it’s not one that I can give you a definitive answer to. A lot depends on who you are dating, and what her preferences are. I think it also varies quite a bit depending on the age of the person you are with, their own comfort (or lack thereof) with the naturalness of the human body, and what you two choose to do together.

      Personally, I don’t really care either way. It’s something I talk about with my partners, but more in a “What are you comfortable with?” kind of way than a “You must do X” kind of way.

      I will say it’s easier/more-comfortable to suck on a man’s balls if they are shaved. However, I’m a fan of adults who look like adults, and having pubic hair is part of that. The hairless prepubescent look turns me off. So I do ask that if he chooses to shave, he keeps the razor only to a specific area (cock and balls) and not go crazy with the de-furring.

      I don’t necessarily believe my preferences (or lack thereof) are the norm, but neither do I believe you should automatically just shave everything off. Then again, I’m not in the dating scene either.

      I don’t know if this is anything to go by, but it occurs to me that last time I was at the sex club, most of the women, who were my age or older, kept their bush in a similar fashion to mine, or didn’t shave at all. The ones in their 20s were all bare. Likewise the men: those in their 40s and 50s were a mix of partially shaved (cock and balls) and completely natural. The only ones who were fully razored were the younger set.

      If you’re leaning toward casual sex or meet-n-fucks… Maybe shave I guess. (?) If you’re comfortable doing it. But if you’re truly dating – having conversations and exploring all the facets of building relationships – I’d recommend making it Something To Talk About, and then you can go from there.

        1. Mrs Fever Post author

          Hahaha! That’s awesome! 😀
          LOVE the old school pink curlers. 😛

          As for the trimming… That’s some sensitive skin down there, and nature didn’t intend for it to be bare. So go gentle on yourself. Ease into it. Things might be a bit uncomfortable at first.

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      Girl parts…

      I have a tendency, when I’m explaining something or telling a story, to refer to my “lady bits.” 🙂

        1. Mrs Fever Post author

          Everyone has different preferences. I think when it comes to the language you use, it’s important to choose words you’re comfortable with. Your reasons are your own, but they are worth examining.

          A blogger friend of mine likes the word ‘cunny’; it’s not as blunt as ‘cunt’ and has a certain playful Victorian naughtiness to it. It’s not a word I would choose for myself, but it “fits” her. And that’s largely what communication is about: finding the words that fit. 🙂

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      Heh. He could probably draw a perfect replica from all my descriptions over the years and he’s never even seen it. 😛

      Him: Sooo… Whatcha wanna talk about?

      Me: Let me tell you about my vagina…

  2. dysfunctionalwomansdigest

    Entertaining and informative post! I became used to hearing the word “cunt” from watching Game of Thrones…personally, I love the way that Sarah Silverman says “pussy” with a lisp! Hilarious! My personal preference: pussy. XO DWD

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      “Pussy” is my go-to descriptor for all things sexyful. 🙂

      One word I use a lot, but definitely NOT erotically, is “snatch.” It’s tons of fun to say. In a Dr Seuss Does Dallas kind of way. (Do Sneeches have snatches?) 😉

  3. foresterinthewoods

    I find your definitions on target with me. Pussy is my favorite, Kitty usually as a nickname for her not her pussy. Cunt definitely a no except in hard writing. I also like the technical terms, vagina, vulva, pussy lips. Do not like slot, snatch, hole, gash, glory spot.

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      I’m not a fan of objectifying vocabulary, generally speaking. Glory hole? *shudder*

      I’m picky about how I talk about genitals, and what we do with them. I prefer ‘cock’ to ‘dick’ and I abhor the term ‘weiner’ in all its variations.

      I’m also not a fan of the term ‘jerking off’; it’s too… Seventh grade. And ‘making love’ as a euphemism gets under my skin. Making love is, for me, a variant on the penetrative sex act that involves a very specific mental and emotional framework. Fucking is NOT ‘making love’. But sometimes you can make love while fucking. 🙂

      If that makes sense.

      1. foresterinthewoods

        Yes, it makes sense. Making love for us can be the cuddling, caressing and oral. Penetrative is also making love. We shy from the use of fuck, because it has become so common in today’s daily conversation. However, it does come out when the intercourse is strong, sweaty and very hot.

        1. Mrs Fever Post author

          You said “for us,” and I think therein lies the key. As long as the people participating are on the same page about what they are doing, and what it means, that’s what’s important. 🙂

  4. Jayne

    You make me want to write a Dr Seuss thing starting with
    Is Your ‘Gina
    much more fin-ah
    than a gals’ from Carolina
    Ir Is it sprucy
    as a goosey
    like the ones in Chatahootchie
    but…I’m on one glass of wine
    and I’m sure that it’s fine
    So I say Cheers to all labia
    One sip at a time.
    feel free to erase
    for I will give no chase

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      Colloquialisms are funny.

      Growing up in the American Midwest, “fanny” meant “butt” – as in,”Move your fanny, girl! We’re gonna be late!”

      I recall, as a child, being thoroughly confused at being introduced to an elderly woman as, “This is Miss Fanny.”

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