If you’ve got love in your sites…

      14 Comments on If you’ve got love in your sites…

WATCH OUT

Love Bites

(How many of you knew those were the spoken words to the opening line, hmmm?)

‘Love bites’ in terms of suckling bruises left on the skin, tiny teeth marks indented in tegument, or rough-red rawness burning tender flesh in the aftermath of a sexual interlude…

For many of us, these kinds of love bites hold positive connotations.

  • Early sexual explorations are often marked – on our bodies (whether intentional or not) and in our memories – with the over-eager initiatory lust-infused suckling of skin that results in hickeys.
  • No-holds-barred, high-adrenaline sexual contact – no matter one’s age – can turn feral. Teeth and claws bite and scratch; fingertips dig bruises into hips; we taste one another with the desire to mark — for indelible proof to later greet us on our partner/s’ skin that we lived that moment together.
  • Nibbles turned fiercer then gentled again… Beards burning over freshly-scraped flesh… A sexual sunburn.

These are bare-naked memories we dress in the vestiges nostalgia. And, in doing so, we often put the past in its sartorial finest.

My first ‘real’ boyfriend’s lips at the soft spot between my shoulder and neck, feeling what ‘wet’ meant for the first time in response to the ministrations of another…

My husband’s teeth pressing his bite mark into the flesh of my shoulder while fucking me from behind, triggering my orgasm…

Whisker burn over scraped skin:  on my collarbone, at the base of my neck, between my thighs…

While my feelings on marking have changed significantly over time*, I still have fond memories of being in the moment during all those times.

But outside the marking moment, in the greater scheme of the relationship/s, ‘love bites’ takes on a whole nother meaning.

I think I’ve always known that.

Which is probably why I’ve always been drawn to this Def Leppard song.

Because I understood – in bone-deep, born-old ways – from the time I was very young that love *does* bite. (All wild and uncontrollable things do.) As the lyrics say: It’s no surprise.

So it is not with negativity or resignation that I nod along to some of my still-favorite lyrics, but with a sense of acceptance and a full-circle acknowledgment of truth. And when Joe Elliott repeats the opening phrase at the fade out, I almost always nod along in quiet agreement.

If you’ve got love in your sites… Watch out.

Love Bites

(It’s going to be hell.)

*Pretty much I just don’t do it anymore. This has to do with proprietary notions/assumptions of ‘ownership’ and considerations of consent, not just between the participatory parties but where viewers’/outsiders’ own agency/choice is concerned.

© Mrs Fever – Temperature’s Rising

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14 thoughts on “If you’ve got love in your sites…

    1. Mrs Fever Post author

      I love that you did! 🙂

      I have fantastic memories of that song. The whole album, actually. (The whole band! *laugh*) I seriously considered writing a post about Def Leppard for this KOTW. 😉

      Reply
  1. Brigit Delaney

    While don’t mind a love bite or two, the whole hickey thing has passed. The last thing I need is a student asking me about my weekend exploits because of the marks on my neck. Eww.

    Reply
  2. chris

    Feve: I’m glad you decided
    to choose “Love Bites”,
    and not Nazareth’s
    “Love Hurts”


    or worse:
    J.Geils Band’s
    “Love Stinks”….


    ……. just sayin. 😀

    Reply
  3. Ria Restrepo

    I’m so glad this Def Leppard song didn’t occur to me, because then there would have been three of us using it! Anyway, I love the whole D/s, possessiveness aspect of love bites. Thanks for sharing! 😉

    Reply
  4. Bee

    Not tucking others’ yum but I’ve never liked them, hated being pinned down whilst they were inflicted on me. Hated others being forced to see them. Accidental bruises are one thing, forced ones I just can’t stand.

    Reply

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