So. Elfin’. Soxy.

So we all know I’m a champion seductress, right? I mean, I know myriad ways to get my partner wet. And I’m pretty stellar at announcing my nakedness or my freshly-showered-ness and then just… y’know… letting him come a-runnin’.

So with having aced those kinds of mad seduction skillz already, I decided – on the day I took my Happy Christmas post pictures – to up my game.

Which meant I stripped down to my silly seasonal socks and donned a Santa hat, then I stood in his doorway and went “Ta-da!”

Only not verbally. I mean, I didn’t SAY “Ta-da!” I did the pose. You know, the arms-up-hip-tilt, one-knee-popped pose.

TA-DA!

And he was all, “Oooooh… Come here, little elf!”

Which was pretty much the response I’d counted on. Only I hadn’t counted on being expected to move from my pose. So it took me a sec to figure out my strategy, and then I decided if I just took tiny hoppy steps toward where he was sitting, I could *keep* my Ta-Da! pose.

Which meant I hobble-wobbled – with arms upthrust, hip canted outward, and knee popped forward – my way over about eight feet of floor, and when I arrived directly in front of the man, I stuck my chin up and widened my Ta-Da!

Which…

It’s a good thing my husband thinks I’m sexy no matter what ridiculously ‘seductive’ thing I try to do.

: laugh :

Anywhoo…

So, yeah.

I gave up on the RawR routine at that point* though and was like, “Hey, you wanna help me have an orgasm?”

Which… Of course he wanted to help me have an orgasm.

*grin*

And he did a good job of it too.

I used my vibrator; he used his finger.**

And once my g-spot figured out that the wobbly-doo that the pad of his finger was working against its roughened flesh was a Good Thing, it managed to communicate clearly with my clit – which was all a-buzz with good vibrations – that it was

holyohmyGod wheredidthatcomefrom

time to have an orgasm.

And…

It was not only a sneaky bastard of an orgasm, it was also one of those rolling ones. Not ‘rolling’ as in ‘continuous’. But more like… It sort of started as a trickle and middled as a surging wave, then subsided in a slow withdrawal… Like the way a tide goes out.

And it left me in a puddle.

Which is why, when he asked, “If I use a lot of lube,*** can I…?”, my orgasm-addled brain translated that to Oh how nice and I said “Yes.”

But my body was not on the same page as my puddle-brain and was *NOT* digging the intrusion,**** so I was really glad that his recent long period of pussy-denial had left him with approximately zero stamina.

(Though not, apparently, with zero ejaculate. Because even though it was over in an instant, the man made a mess. Good Lord, I don’t think the sheets will ever recover.)

When he stopped shaking — the shakes a result of both his post-cum endorphin-flood and joyfully abashed laughter — he said, “It’s like an early Christmas…”

I shook my head, pushing him off me and making shoo-ing motions with my hands,***** then responded with a tongue-stuck-through-teeth grin,

“I dunno about early… But it sure came quick.”

*much to the relief of the cat, I think, who had been watching these goings-on with a distinct air of feline befuddlement

**just one finger, thank you — I can’t tolerate much in the way of penetration these days; it amazes me that I was ever able to take four of his fingers, because right now even one sometimes feels like too much

***there is no such thing as too much lube when it comes to any kind of penetrative activity for me right now — basically, too much is never enough

****this is really the only part of menopause that is painful for me… quite literally

*****which he correctly interpreted as “Go get me something to wipe this splooge off with! QUICK!”